let's see the list of events that SUCKED the life out of my day today:
- i only wore the outer layer of my northface, but it's RAINING and it's freakin cold. so i have to buy a sweater at the book store. well it's a crew. and it's comfy--but had to walk all the way to freakin' south campus.
- i will only have classes MWF. good right? NOT. because french is EVERYDAY. so that means TUESDAYS AND THURSDAY i'll be coming on campus for ONE HOUR of french....with ANNABELLE<--the french devil professor
- biological anthropology sucked big balls so i decided to leave
- had the first serious talk with nam. no fighting, but just some things that needed to be talked about eventually, happened.
- then i just researched all lunch. i found my shit, but i had to literally INHALE a hot pocket to make it to french on time.
- GET TO FRENCH, and then i totally forgot to relook at the material for the QUIZ. i got some right, but i bombed it.
- we have a test in french on THURSDAY
- my paper is due FRIDAY--how much do i have written? ZERO
- i have to do the entire chapter 7 in our workbook.
- ex-factor interferes..great.
WHAT THE FUCK EVER.--I'M PISSED.
i haven't written about you in a really long time. i really don't care about you anymore. nor am i in love with you anymore, but please PLEASE just leave me alone. i'm not being disrespectful by dating someone else right after you. you DUMPED ME THREE MONTHS AGO. do you remember? remember you begging to LEAVE? i'm respecting myself for damn sure by making myself happy. i'm stupid for believing you when you told me you had nothing with her. SHE SLEPT OVER TWICE. one with megan, yeah sure. but you two slept together a second time. and probably a gagillion times after at her HOUSE. you're with someone else now. i don't know i don't care. we call her your girlfriend because excuse me, but have YOU FREAKIN' LOOKED AT YOUR MYSPACE AND BLOG?! i haven't so i don't know. but i know they are sanctuaries to her. what is everyone suppose to think?!?! you made a thank you list for her. SHIT I MADE YOU. you say the same things you told me. i have a bad past. i get that. everyone knows that. but i NEVER use the same shit to the same guys. we call her your girlfriend (which we rarely say because we have better things to talk about than you) because that's how you flaunt her. you aren't official but she already met your older sister. you made her SIT NEXT TO HER AT THE CONCERT. you bring her to your LITTLE SISTER'S GAME. see how that's disrespectful to me? because you knew i was going to go, you BRING HER..AND YOU SIT NEXT TO YOUR DAD. you make our friends CHOOSE SIDES. do you know what?! THEY AREN'T PICKING SIDES. they are defending their friendships with you. YOU AREN'T BEING A FRIEND TO THEM. you almost made me a shitty friend you know that? to them, they are the best things to happen to me. i would have never found friends like them if it weren't for you, i give you that, but they aren't JUST your friends anymore--THEY ARE MINEEE TOOOOOOO!!! i'm so sick of you saying their only yours. your sisters are MY FRIENDS TOO. you would make a more compelling argument if you were a better friend. you used to dog one of our friends..THE HARDEST, when she would ditch us, well hey, TAKE A LOOK IN THE MIRROR. you're rewriting history. i'm so tired of you getting on ou friends like that. they aren't doing this for me. they aren't mad at you for me, they are made at you because you aren't around anymore. you CHOOSE THEM OVER US. you choose her/them over ME.
another thing: THEY ARE HAPPY. you would be the one to ruin a happy home. i've never seen a homewrecker in the shape you've taken. she's your freakin' sister. as long as she's happy, you should freakin' LET HER BE HAPPY. and she's your really good friend. she's happy too. STOP TRYING TO BRING THEM DOWN.
if you take her away from me, i'll hate you more than anything in the entire world. because i already hate you NOW.
he was suppose to be YOUR BESTFRIEND. you don't even kick it with him. you talk to him? about what? ---yeah that's what i thought.
i don't see them as YOURS anymore. THIS CUSTODY BATTLE is fucking stupid. you need to stop being a jerk because i gave you the life you wanted. everything you dreamt of, no drama, being single (well we don't know about that now do we?), i let you go because that's what you wanted
but at the end of the fucking day, i did it for me--you fucking murdered me.
and to think i cried. spend my life with you is seriously a great APRIL FOOL'S prank.
the few things good today: i don't have french all week next week, i found big red, and nam's coming here in a few hours. to soothe me
passion videos up soon =]
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